Gardening and Parenting

I was doing a little gardening today. Actually, I was pruning some azalea bushes. Now, seeing that it is spring time and I am pruning some azalea bushes, you would immediately know that I know very little about gardening and don’t do a good job with what little I do know. I think you are actually suppose to prune azalea bushes in the fall. At least that would be my guess. But these hadn’t been pruned for a number of years and they were looking very bad and producing a very little amount of flowering.

As I was doing the pruning, I began to think about how what I was doing was very similar in nature to the managing of relationships and in particular the parenting of my boys.

First of all, I know very little about gardening. While I would like to believe I am a good parent and I do the best I can, it often occurs to me that I don’t really know what I am doing. I don’t have all of the answers. I move from situation to situation with a sense of managing each issue and encounter with my boys as though “I have never been here before but I’ll figure it out as I go”. Sure, I’ll read a book, glean what I can from it and give it 100%. But, I approach each major issue with them really just relying on God’s guidance and some pretty good advice from Elyshia. The bottom line however is I am no expert.

Second, gardening should be constant. There was a movie a while back entitled “The Constant Gardener”. I never saw it, but I think it has a great title. As I was working in my garden, I realized that this should have been done a while back. If it had, the bushes may not have been in as bad a shape as they were. Gardens need continual care. I don’t think I parent continually. Sure I am there with them as much as I possibly can be. But, am I parenting? How often am I teaching them life lessons? When do I work with them on maturing their relationship with their Heavenly Father? How much time do I spend challenging them to grow in the relationships around them? How often has my inconsistency wounded them?

Finally, pruning hurts. I had planted those azalea bushes almost 12 years ago. I don’t recall ever giving them a good pruning over that time period. As I began to really prune them back, it was painful for me. I didn’t want to see the plant shrink or lose what little flowers it had. But, as we all know it was necessary. Parenting is sometimes painful. It would be easy and less painful sometimes to just let my boys grow on their own, unattended. However, in the long run the result could be much more painful.

Lord, help me to do the best job possible with the limited knowledge I have. May I be constant in my love and instruction and may it be done with as little pain as possible.